Shabbat

Shabbat is the seventh day of the Jewish week, a day of rest and sanctification. The Torah grounds it in the commandment to remember the day of Shabbat and sanctify it (Exodus 20:8) and in stopping all work that day, for yourself and for those in your household (Exodus 20:9-11; Leviticus 23:3). Another verse adds that no fire is to be kindled in any of your dwellings on Shabbat (Exodus 35:3).

The Jewish day begins the evening before (Genesis 1:5: “there was evening and there was morning”). So Shabbat starts on Friday evening, before nightfall, and ends Saturday night. The exact time depends on the location and on the custom of the community: do not guess it. Ask your rabbi or check a local Jewish calendar.

1How Shabbat unfolds

It is welcomed by lighting candles. The Shulchan Arukh asks that the light be made handsome (Orach Chayim 263:1), and the Rema records the custom of lighting three or four. Then come prayer, kiddush over wine, and the Friday night meal. On Saturday there is morning prayer, a second meal, and a third meal late in the afternoon, before Havdalah marks the end. The Shulchan Arukh also asks that one prepare during the week to honor the day (Orach Chayim 242:1).

2Across communities

The framework is shared by all Jews; what differs is how it is lived.

• Sephardic, Ashkenazi, and Mizrahi families each have their own songs, melodies, dishes, and prayer schedules. These are passed down within families, so ask about yours instead of assuming.
• The number of candles, how a family hosts at the table, or when the Saturday meal is served is a matter of family custom, not a single rule.
• Secular Israelis: many families mark Friday night with a dinner and kiddush without keeping every prohibition. Observance varies from one family to the next, and even among the guests of one event.

3What it changes when you set the date

• Wedding: weddings are not held on Shabbat. The Shulchan Arukh (Orach Chayim 339:4) rules out betrothal that day; the Rema discusses an urgent case, which should not be settled without a rabbi. A wedding date that falls on Shabbat calls for explicit confirmation.
• Bar or bat mitzvah: Shabbat is the usual date for the Torah reading, and the celebration is built around it.
• Saturday night: an event that begins “after Shabbat” cannot start at a time chosen at random. Ask your rabbi when Shabbat ends where you live.
• Friday evening: a dinner or reception is possible, as long as the preparation takes the day into account (see below).

4What observant guests may or may not do

Many guests who keep Shabbat do not drive, use their phones, or take photos that day. These are customs generally observed in observant families, tied to the prohibition of work (Exodus 20:10) and of fire (Exodus 35:3); how each rule applies to each object depends on the ruling of each person’s rabbi. It is not ours to rule on, so it is best simply to plan around it.

• No replying to the invitation by phone or text that day: set a reply deadline before Shabbat.
• No photographer or camera: ask the host, or the rabbi of the synagogue or venue, what is planned.
• No car for many guests: state the walking distance from the synagogue or from lodging.
• Sound system, lighting, hot food: the venue rabbi’s ruling comes first; do not promise anything in advance.